A New Minion at the Gateway To Hell Grocery Store

by Leslie

I hit a snag going through the scan-it-yourself line at The Grocery Store That Is Also A Gateway To Hell. I had scanned a jar of pasta sauce and placed in the bag with no problem. When I scanned a second jar, it came up wrong on the screen; it said I had scanned bruschetta at a price much higher than the pasta sauce. I called for the attending clerk and pointed out the problem, “When I scanned this pasta sauce, it came up on the screen as bruschetta.”

She said, “Just scan your pasta sauce and put it in the bag if you want to buy it.”

I told her, “I scanned it, but it came up wrong.”

After an eye roll and an annoyed sigh she asked, “Well, where’s the bruschetta?”

“There isn’t any. That’s what came up when I scanned the pasta sauce.”

“Oh, well that can’t be.”

“Well, it is. Would you like to scan it and see?”

“Um, no. If you don’t want the bruschetta, take it out of the bag and I’ll take it off.”

“I don’t have any bruschetta. The pasta sauce rang up as bruschetta, but there is no bruschetta. I’d just like to buy this pasta sauce.”

She checks the bagging area and my cart, then looks me over real good. “So you’re saying you didn’t scan any bruschetta?”

“I did not scan any bruschetta. I scanned the pasta sauce. It came up wrong. That’s why I asked for your help.”

With another annoyed sigh, she went back to her post and fixed the error in the computer. I continued scanning, paid and put my grocery bags in my cart. As I headed past her toward the door, she stopped me for one last bruschetta check. After that, I was hesitant to leave because I didn’t think she was convinced of my innocence. I assured her once more that I did not have any bruschetta in my cart or on my person, but I don’t think anything short of a strip search would have proven it to her. I asked if it was okay for me to leave. I stood there as she thought for a moment wishing I had some bruschetta to give her so she could make it all right in her head and let me go. Finally, she said yes and I walked out of there feeling angry and upset. Did she really believe I had the phantom bruschetta? Did she think I was trying to steal it? Why was she so distrustful of me?

My shopping days at that store are numbered as our countdown to our move is nearing its end. Perhaps on my final visit to the store I should wrap up some bruschetta to offer her as a gift, right after I go through the 15 items or less aisle with 16 items and force the anti-bagger to bag them for me.

Posted in Mommy's Stuff |