My first New Year’s Eve
with David home to kiss me
when the clock strikes twelve.

Revelations

by Leslie

It’s the last day of 2008, so I thought I’d take a moment to share with you some things I’ve learned over the past year.

  1. Having two children isn’t twice as much work as having one. It’s more than that. Much, much more. And that much more if you have a puppy, too. Particularly if the puppy weighs more than your grandma.
  2. Having another child doesn’t double the love in your heart. It’s does more than that. And though less than a year may have passed since that child came into your life, it won’t feel like it. It’ll feel like she’s been a part of you forever.
  3. Being an only child may not be as awesome as you thought it was, because siblings are useful and parents are a handful.
  4. A good grandpa is impossible to replace.
  5. So is a good husband.
  6. Even though you’re trying to save money, there are some things that are still worth paying for. Like fabric softener and lean meat. Also, dog obedience training. Or counseling.
  7. Forgetting to feed 27 hungry cats is a mistake that’ll make you understand the victims in any zombie movie.
  8. Four-year-olds are smarter than you thought.
  9. Fish are ridiculously fragile. You can kill them with a hard stare.
  10. True friends are easy to discern. They read your blog, adopt your sock monkeys and rave about your buckeyes. They’re willing to invest in anything you put yourself into. And some days, that’s the very reason you choose to get up and live.

Happy New Year, readers. Thank you for being you.

Woke up this morning
and the Corvette has a flat.
Will it ever end?

I truly believe
that somewhere someone has a
Voodoo doll of me

And they’re dunking it
in the toilet, which is why
I’m drowning in shit.

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