I received a haircut I absolutely love last week. I had it done while I was out of town for my baby doctor appointment, so the stylist was new to me, but her name was Leslie and that made me like her right away. And she met all of my hair stylist criteria, which are the following:
- My hair stylist must have a great haircut. My hair is fine and thinning and requires the work of an illusionist to make it look good. If my stylist can’t make the most with what she’s got, she doesn’t have a chance with me. (And I’m not saying “she” to be sexist. I just haven’t had a male stylist. Not that I wouldn’t. I surely would. They just aren’t in great supply in my area. Don’t be offended. Men can cut hair. I love you!) Leslie had a great haircut. She was really cute.
- If I ask my hair stylist’s opinion, I expect him to have one. (See how I changed it up for you? I love men who cut hair!) Nothing annoys me more than asking a stylist, “What do you think?” and hearing, “I don’t know,” or “Whatever you want.” Well, what I want is your opinion. I’d rather hear an opinion I don’t agree with than “I don’t know.” “I don’t know” translates to “I don’t care.” I don’t tip people who don’t care. Well, that’s not true. I tip everyone. I just won’t tip them as well as I would have and I’ll resent them for the tip they get. That’s almost as powerful as a voodoo curse. Leslie had opinions and pictures to illustrate them! And she was really excited about them! I love Leslie!
- My hair stylist must have good conversation skills. If the stylist cuts my hair in silence, I believe it’s because she hates me. I know people have whole other lives that have nothing to do with me, but if a person is cutting my hair, I’d really like it if they focused on me a little bit. I’m a poor girl. Getting a haircut is a big deal. It’s my chance to feel pampered. I want my stylist to talk to me and ask me questions. Leslie asked lots of questions and even drew the conclusion that, “This cut suits your personality.” I love that! She even explained all the products she used and why she chose them just for me! I want to date Leslie!
- My hair stylist must be flexible and give me options. If my cut is over and I decide I want bangs after all or I want it a little shorter in the back, my stylist should do it for me without getting all huffy and pissy. Pissy is my least favorite adjective, so if my stylist embodies it, she becomes my least favorite person, especially because I am paying her. I’d never pay anyone to be pissy. Leslie wasn’t the least bit pissy when I asked her to go a little shorter in the back. In fact, she told me, “You know, you were right to go a little shorter.” I want to marry Leslie!
- My hair stylist should encourage me to come back to her. I hate those salons that don’t allow you to request a specific stylist because they’re all supposed to be equally skilled and qualified to cut your hair. Because that’s total bullshit. What they’re really telling you is that they’re a nasty place to work and their turnover is so high, the woman you liked probably won’t be there in six weeks, especially if she’s good. Stylists are not created equal. I’m specifically thinking of Ms. Attitude with the skunk highlights that smells like cigarette smoke and rolls her eyes a lot. She is not qualified to cut my hair (see above hair stylist criteria). Leslie gave me her card that included her hours and a coupon for money off my return visit to her. And yesterday? I got a postcard in the mail from Leslie thanking me for my visit and telling me she can’t wait to see me again. So, I called and made my appointment to coincide with my next baby doctor trip where I intend to propose to Leslie. She is the perfect stylist. I want her to be mine forever.
Do you have a regular hair stylist or do you just go wherever, whenever you can get in?