Dave and I took the girls Trick or Treating last night.

My girls, ready to Trick or Treat

Phoebe was Piglet, Lucy was a flower, and you can’t tell in the photograph, but Julia was a cheerleader. We resolved our stalemate by agreeing that she would wear an old dance recital costume. I wasn’t totally happy and neither was she, but no one was absolutely unhappy either. Compromise: when no one really wins and everyone loses a little bit which is better than losing all the way, I guess. (I think I should be a tagline writer.)

I got both Phoebe and Lucy’s costumes at Goodwill for less than $10 each. I declared to Amy that this makes me, officially, THE QUEEN OF SAVINGS. She didn’t disagree, so let’s call me that.

Lucy was really feeling her costume. Here she is soaking up the sun.

Lucy the Flower

I didn’t have to remind that kid even once to use her manners. She greeted everyone with a “Trick or Treat!” and followed up every treat transaction with a hearty, “Thank you!” I reveled in this as I realize it may not last. Julia used to have manners, too.

Speaking of having no manners (segue!), I was mean to a store employee yesterday. Rather, I was mean near one. She was caught in what Dave calls my “aura of anger” which really just makes caring people feel uncomfortable because they know I’m mad and they want to fix it but they don’t know how. And the answer is: you cannot. If you make me mad and then you try to make it better, it makes me more mad. And if you make me mad and you do nothing, it makes me even more mad, too. So, I guess the real answer is: do not make me mad. EVER.

All I will say about the store situation is this: if I have more than $100 worth of groceries in my cart and more kids than hands in my company, forcing me down the self checkout line is probably a really dumb idea. You’re probably going to see me get huffy and puffy. I will scowl. I might even mumble under my breath. And if it’s really bad, like it was yesterday, I’ll say, “Thank you,” but I WILL NOT tell you to have a great day. And then I’ll go home and feel bad about that.

If I can be a little bit honest, I’ll tell you that I’ve been feeling bad about a lot of things lately. And if you’re asking, “Like what?” Well, everything. And nothing. Read this. Meanwhile, I’m taking my husband’s advice. I’m circling my wagons. That’s what you do when you feel thrown to the wolves, right? So, I’m doing that and some other idiom. The world just feels like a really harsh place right now. I’m turning inward for a bit.