Listen, you guys. Come here. Sit down with me. I’d offer you some cake, but I’m trying to lose weight. I know, that’s silly. You can’t send cake through a computer. Let’s have virtual cake. (It has no calories!)

Alright. Here’s a napkin. (Pretend.)

I need to get back in shape. I know this. My brain hurts from how much I know this. There are so many good reasons to do it. I’ve got my girls. I’ve got Dave. I’ve got GO TO A NUDE BEACH to cross off my life list. I have all the motivation I need! What I don’t have? Urgency. This is why I’ve been eating all Last Supper-Style wherein my diet starts tomorrow and tomorrow never comes!

When I lost weight (more than 100 pounds!) after Lucy was born, I had a BlogHer conference and a biggest loser contest breathing down my neck to make me make it happen NOW (or THEN, I suppose). Well, I think I’ve found the thing to make it happen NOW, you know, again: A Zombie Infested 5K Obstacle Course Race.

Dave and I are registered to run in the 1:30 p.m. wave of the Run For Your Lives race in Pennsylvania on Labor Day weekend. This means I’ve got a little over five months to get fit enough to outrun some dead people.

I think I can do it. Do you?